Christmas Reflections

Recently I have seen several western reports about various places in China banning Christmas celebrations this year. A skeptic of the media, including the western one, I did not think much about the news. I also happen to believe that my former country has the right to celebrate whatever holidays it wishes to celebrate.

Then I met Ms Z., a client of mine. A US resident who works mostly in China. Ms Z and her husband are not uncommon among many Chinese living in America: they have many ties in China, and few in America. Ms Z is an artist and he an educator; they do not speak much English, which undoubtedly is a barrier for them to get into “mainstream” American culture. While here, they had to work low-paying jobs just to get by. Years ago they returned to China, talked about abandoning their US residency a few times, yet somehow never quite pulled the plug.

Responding to my inquiry about lives back home, Ms. Z opened up: "It's been good: I make 3 times more as an artist in China, my husband also can do what he enjoys doing – teaching, which is impossible for him here. Things are cheaper there, it's also much more convenient with foods and stuff, and we have families and friends..."

Then she startled me: “But we have decided definitely NOT to give up our green cards. In fact, we are moving back in the next 2 or 3 years.”

Seeing my puzzled expression, she smiled and pointed to her son who was sitting by her side, “he is 12, he needs to come back to live.”

Ah, I have heard it countless times: a big motivation for Chinese to immigrate to America is children; parents themselves mostly prefer to stay in China. As a Chinese who has settled somewhat comfortably in America, this is something I do not fully understand: if the parents prefer China, then China must be “better” for them, yet why are they pushing their kids to move away? Don’t parents always want “what's best” for their children?

“There’s increasing,” Ms. Z. continued, before I could say anything, pointing to her head, “'thought control' going on back there. Even Christmas is banned this year.” she shook her head slightly, with an air of disbelief and resignation.

I have never discussed personal beliefs with Ms. Z. But judging from her mild manners, typical of us Chinese, I would be surprised if she were an ideologue or religious maniac of any stripe. I realized my client was not entirely happy with life back home, the much better economic opportunities there notwithstanding.

Personally I have come to appreciate the Christmas season. I enjoy Christmas carols. Good Christmas music is numerous, and an integral part of the Western art, new and old. One of my favorite pieces is Trans-Siberian Orchestra’s Christmas canon (see the link below), viewed over 20 million times on YouTube.

Another piece I like is "Carol of the Bells" by Libera, viewed over 7 million times on YouTube:

There is something absolutely magical, maybe even "heavenly", to hear the voices of children singing in unison like this. Professor Peter Kreeft of Boston College, who stated there are “20 arguments for the existence of God," would call this an “aesthetic experience” that points to the existence of God.

I am sure many of the millions of YouTube viewers are not religious, yet they must have found an “aesthetic experience” so powerful that they keep going back. People like Dr. Kreeft would argue that our "aesthetic experience" points to an unrelenting quest for the spirit, deep in the human psyche, whether we are aware of it or not. This further proves that humans are both material and spiritual beings; as such we have both material needs that can be satisfied with the material (food, shelter, money, fame etc.) and a spiritual hunger that can only be fed with the "spirit."

I am not a Christian (at least not yet), but coming from an atheist background, I have found the “spiritual aspect” of the American culture appealing. A few days ago I attended an evening Mass at a local Catholic Church. I’ve only started attending Mass sporadically in the last few months. Carol singing appears to be a major part of the Mass. That night’s service wasn’t particularly impressive, nor was the singing particularly high quality. But I thoroughly enjoyed the experience - I was even brought to tears a few times by the combination of the music, the liturgy and the atmosphere. I was struck and moved by an “aesthetic experience” that could not be explained in any way other than an acute awareness of the reality of God on that very occasion.

So I love the Christmas season, including the spiritual side of the festival. When I lived in China, I had the vague awareness that I was fed only “material foods” while my “spiritual hunger,” in a society that preaches unbashful “materialism”, was ignored. I was left restless and unsatisfied. While I am now still restless and unsatisfied, I value the opportunity to live in a place where the search for and the feeding of the spiritual hunger of my humanity are not so bluntly denied.

When I realized this, I not only was able to understand Ms. Z. but also for a moment could not help but feel a sense of gratitude for where we are and an “itty-bitty” sadness for our countrymen back home.